Success, Failure & Rahul Gandhi

So, Mr. Rahul Gandhi has lost another election. While the bhakt brigade on social media will have a field day, I hope he doesn’t lose heart & quit politics. Actually, he should have done this a long time back but we are not discussing it on this post. Results of the Karnataka elections made me think of success & failure & Rahul Gandhi’s political journey so far. Okay, that journey has only been a failure, but who knows when the tide would turn...

Charles Darwin admitted “I was considered by all my masters and my father, a very ordinary boy, rather below the common standard of intellect.” A sentiment that Rahul would readily agree with. Except that he still has to attain the heights of success that Darwin did. He still has time on his hands & hopefully he will.

C. S. Lewis said, “Failures, repeated failures, are finger posts on the road to achievement. One fails forward toward success.” It appears to be one long road for our warrior. He has already come a long way & should plod on. Would IK Gujral & Manmohan Singh have, in the wildest of their dreams, ever imagined themselves as Prime Ministers. At least Rahul has the surname that grants him the 1^st right of refusal whenever the Congress gets a chance.

Success is not final, failure is not fatal; it is the courage to continue that counts. This was Winston Churchill, the guy who pulled his country through the despairing years of WW-II. While not comparing our Rahul baba to Churchill, he has given enough evidence of the courage to stick around in the electoral arena despite repeated losses. (Sadly, the bravery awards are not given to the civilians else Rahul would have been a prime candidate.) Maybe, in the not so distant future, Rahul would be able to turn around the fortunes of the Congress that he has almost single-handedly destroyed.

“They told me I couldn’t sing” is what he told his father after returning from the audition. That was Elvis Presley. Rahul has also been in this situation more often than not & should get inspired by the phenomenon that Presley later turned out to be. Or, Fred Astaire who was rejected during a Hollywood screen test because he “Can’t act. Slightly Bald. Dances a little.” If they can, why can’t Rahul?

Failure is simply the opportunity to begin again, this time more intelligently. Did Henry Ford have a premonition of someone like Rahul Gandhi coming into existence much after he had passed away? It seems so, for Rahul has lived the 1^st part & proven the 2^nd part!!

We all know what Thomas Edison said – “I have not failed. I have just found 10000 ways that won’t work.” So has Rahul. Though he is still a long way away from reaching the 10000 failure milestone. Hopefully, it would arrive while one is still alive. He should start eating Mentos. It is supposed to light up dimaag ki batti.

“Failure is unimportant. It takes courage to make a fool of yourself.” Not just Churchill, but by Charlie Chaplin’s standards too, Rahul Gandhi is personification of courage. Bravo man, keep plodding! Like Chaplin, you also have the knack of making people laugh at you without even trying hard.

Anyway, whatever be the final outcome of the Karnataka elections (Congress & JDS can, theoretically, still form the government), Rahul should now start planning for the 2019 general elections. And the state assembly elections that would be held in the meantime. If nothing else, he will continue to entertain us.

Pic source: http://www.naveenchoudhary.com/misc/rahul-gandhi-funny-speech/

Dear Mr. Rahul Gandhi...

Dear Mr. Rahul Gandhi,

You have come a long way. From a future PM aspirant, to a prospective PM aspirant, to a reluctant PM aspirant, to a PM aspirant in waiting, to a designated PM aspirant, and now finally a self-declared PM aspirant. It has been a long journey. More so for your party men who have been waiting for a savior from the days you were an under-aged kid. Thus, your recent coming-of-age announcement of your aspiration has been a shot in the arm for these gentlemen & they will now be able to hold their walking sticks firmly.

I am sure this will now rejuvenate the party in the same manner as your address to the Dalits when you urged them to discover their escape velocity. It made such an impression that they escaped not just Congress clutches but also that of the BSP. Little wonder BSP kept you out of the equation during the Lok Sabha by-elections in UP. But you can always blame it on nepotism, the way Bua & Bhatija monopolized the opposition space.

Going back to the days when you were not in the opposition, the principal opposition leader of the time made a series of historical blunders when he appeared to always get his history wrong. But you took the discourse several notches higher – from history to science, a subject where most netas have been on weak ground. I am waiting for the day you finally become the PM, whenever that happens, so that we would be able to make gold out of potatoes. And once again become Sone ki Chidiya.

Even your opponents are now taking you seriously. We now come across pictures of your road shows (without accompanying vehicles) or election rallies (with missing crowds). Earlier, we only got to see some memes or Pappu jokes on social media. Yes, they still call (and may be still consider) you a Pappu, but that’s because old habits die hard. Don’t take it to heart, for they have now stopped calling you Rahul Baba & there are also enough people who call you RaGa.

I specially admire the political maturity that you have acquired. The way you get involved in election campaigns. And the way you have started visiting places of worship like temples & gurudwaras. And the fact that you no longer disappear on frequent holidays, because politics in India is a 24x7x365 occupation. Maybe, you still take those holidays but keep them sufficiently low profile to escape media scrutiny. Either way, it is smart politics. Those who still call you a Pappu, would soon realise their error.

Now that you have made public your intention of being a PM aspirant, let’s hope you get the position one day. While the incumbent seems set for another term or two, there are others who too harbour such ambitions. But they (Akhilesh, Mayawati, Nitish, Mamata & the rest) still are not recognized nationally. While the ones within your party are not expected to cross swords with the family. Just ensure that Congress as a party survives till that time.

NOTA-riously yours,

Otherwise

Pic credit: https://www.patrika.com/meerut-news/congressi-leader-vinay-pradhan-resigns-and-says-rahul-gandhi-prooves-he-is-pappu-1611287/

Snip

It started with lynching of men where lives were cut out of those not following the social practices of the majority. The vocal urbanites lost no time in decrying this new practice but in the absence of candle light marches this fad has only gained in strength. We are fortunate that only beef eaters are the victims & those of us who savour other animal food (or even garlic & onion) can continue to do so.

Next, we had Pahlaj Nihalani, as Censor Board chief, playing Alok Nath in his sanskari avatar. He is the same person whose films, long back, filled up the front rows in movie halls. He may not be acclaimed for his technical skills or cinematic vision. But credit to him for cult songs like “Sarkaye Lo Khatiya…”, to name one. Most of us believed movie going would again be a pleasure it once was, with Mr. Nihalani heading the august body instituted with the task of regulating films being made. However, this was no beginning of Achhe Din for fans of masala movie (or even those who like the good ones). Pahlaj Nihalani ver 2.0 is adept at chopping scenes not in sync with our sanskaar. Yes, we are yet to watch a film with a blank screen & no dialogue, which indicates he has other means of occupying his time. Though very fine, this still is a silver lining.

Now such things usually happen only to a specific class of people, like film makers & meat sellers (Ok, dalits too). Or, do they? A couple of days back, pausing to see my whatsapp notification while surfing channels, I happened to stop at Aaj Tak. And realized that this penchant for hacking down anyone & anything is getting out of hand. As you know (but cannot believe), Aaj Tak has been rated by Brand Trust Report as the most trusted media brand (http://aajtak.intoday.in/story/aajtak-and-india-today-most-trusted-brands-1-922002.html). Thus, one is forced to take Aaj Tak seriously even if anchors of other news channels (not just newly launched English ones) can shout much, much louder.

Coming back to the news item, it was about spate of incidents in/around Delhi where women’s hair were being cut by unknown persons. (Visit http://aajtak.intoday.in/crime/story/police-lodged-fir-against-unknown-person-who-cut-woman-hair-delhi-1-944157.html & you will know how scary this is.) As you know, her hair is very dear to a woman, next only to gossip & golgappas. Thus, the guys behind snipping off women’s hair have dared to go beyond Nihalani or the anti-beef brigade. And this is not bound by class, caste, etc. It could happen to your wife or your neighbour’s. And you will not like it one bit!! Do you now realize how serious this is? Maybe they may turn out better in short, cropped hair but is it worth the risk? Granted, her visits to the saloon will become less frequent & the expenses come down. But will this get her to spend less time getting ready?

Coming back to the topic, is this a new trend or is it a localized fad that would soon disappear? Had it been limited to Delhi, one would have assumed the latter, believing this to be the job of someone who has not yet been able to recover from the impact of demonetization, odd-even & now, GST. But this is happening in UP too, where the anti-Romeo squads target only couples. And rural Rajasthan, where it is so difficult to see the shape of a woman’s eyebrow, let alone the length of her hair, with the pallu doing as good a job as the burqa. And Haryana, where they just do not dishonor their women (so what if they kill them?).

Now, all these states have BJP governments in power. This could be a conspiracy by the opposition (should we say, marginal?) parties to malign the administration. Well, no again. Some of these opposition guys are too busy preparing for the visit by the not-so-friendly authorities looking for cash & jewelry lying about their homes. While some others are worried about the land holdings that can be linked to them. Even Mamta Banerjee & Arvind Kejriwal have been unusually quiet for some time now. Of course, NDTV 24x7 has also picked up this story but I still won’t believe this is a congress ploy. A party that can’t keep its prince safe from stone pelters in a flood affected area can hardly be trusted to plan a mass hair cutting programme.

But is this something to really worry about? I don’t think so, for we have lived our entire lives with this in one form or the other. Haven’t we all grown up with our teachers cutting our marks for the silliest of reasons? Growing up, we ended up with the government slicing away a good portion of our earnings as tax (but that’s lawful, unlike the cut a “Bhai” takes). Of what was saved from the government, the banks slice wee bits (which add up significantly) in the form of numerous charges we do not even know about. And many companies now routinely cut down their headcount for reasons of austerity.

Long back, the cricket administrators cut down the game from five days to one & from one day to 3 hours. Which has made it watchable to more viewers. And the film makers (perhaps inspired by Pahlaj Nihalani’s success) have been cutting down what actresses wear, which has brought in more viewers than those who left. And those who couldn’t become actresses even after wearing these stripped down dresses joined the 3-hour cricket, which made it even more watchable! Those of you who are salivating at the thought that this could potentially lead to something similar happening to the players too (the grapevine is also talking about a women’s IPL), let me remind you that long back Soviets were sent back from the field because they came down to play in shorts. They haven’t been seen since.

So, keep you fantasies in control & watch the men in blue defeat the men in darker blue in the 2^nd test too. All these stories about women’s hair being cut by some unknown “forces” will die down soon. Remember, the tests will be followed by one days & a T-20. As they say, patience pays!

Picture credit: https://tune.pk/video/1452341/sarkai-lo-khatiya-govinda-karishma-raja-babu-song

How to Make Enemies & Annoy People

Modi spent the 1^st half of his tenure traveling all over the world & making friends with the global leaders. And he was quite successful too, except in the neighbourhood. But by withdrawing the Rs. 500 & Rs. 1000 currency notes, he has, in one stroke, frittered away the goodwill that he had earned within. Not that he cares, but here’s what the mighty & the influential are feeling today:

Bollywood: One would have thought the film industry would have been happy

to see these long queues. So what if these were at Banks & ATMs & not for some 1^st day 1^st show of a Bollywood blockbuster. But the Bollywood moguls are really worried & it is about the donation to Army Welfare Fund. Yes, the fund can be transferred electronically, but they are actually bothered with the processing fees (you know the type!) that needs to be paid for getting the film released. I think they will now move to the Sooraj Barjatiya formula – a song-studded, shot-in-studio, wedding video. Or maybe turn into theme wedding organisers for the likes of Reddy brothers of Bellary.

Rahul Gandhi: For the last many months he has been traversing the hinterland, on bikes, jeeps & choppers. He ate with the villagers & slept in their huts. This was one opportunity to mix with people he could not miss, without getting out in the heat & dust of the countryside. He stood in the queue with them, but they were busy enquiring about the open ATMs in their area. He addressed them, but the queue kept moving forward as the notes were exchanged. He was even willing to bring in cots for them, but they were in a hurry to move to the next Bank. All he got was Rs. 4000 worth of 100 rupee notes.

Mamata Bannerjee: Street battle by street battle, she fought & won against the red army till she conquered West Bengal. And having consolidated her position, she was looking at a larger role for herself at a national level. And then Modi comes up with this one. How is she going to pay her foot soldiers now? But you don’t mess with Didi without incurring her wrath. This royal Bengal tigress is now marching to Delhi. This will be more interesting than Delhi Safari!

Uddhav Thackeray: With Dawood holed up in Pakistan & friendly governments in Delhi & Maharashtra, he was now the undisputed king of Mumbai. But things are getting from bad to worse. First, the Supreme Court started meddling in the heights of human pyramids during janmashtami. Next, the state government handed over Bollywood to kid brother Raj. And now, Modi has hit where it hurts most. All that a law abiding politician can do now is smuggling & drug peddling. Well, he has now decided to join Mamata’s march to Delhi; Durga Pooja pandals can be big business too.

Raj Thackeray: Good friend Fadnavis had brokered a deal & opened up another foolproof revenue stream. Considering the size of Bollywood & the common man’s appetite for the masala it churns out, Raj Thackeray was just beginning to build up a war chest for the next BMC elections. It is now back to extorting toll booths, but even these are closed for the time being. But it’s not so bad as Uddhav is in the same mess too. Or may be a bigger one; isn’t he marching along with Mamata?

Shivraj Singh Chouhan: First he was upstaged as a high performing CM. Next, his squeaky clean image was tarnished with Vyapam. And now this demonetization. He is annoyed with this step motherly treatment to Madhya Pradesh when even those no hopers of West Bengal were allowed enough time to deposit their cash with the bank. Having already given up his aspirations to be the PM, he is now left hoping he stays along as the CM next time round too.

Mayawati: With the uncle squabbling with the nephew, daughters in law engaged in not letting the other get a foothold in state politics & Netaji content playing the Bhishma Pitamah of left-of-centre politics, she was again relishing the opportunity to be CM of the largest state again. She had geared up to complete the unfinished tasks from her previous tenure, what with all those towns still without any of her statues. But trust her to fight the upper caste as it tries to trample the Dalit’s rise in social hierarchy.

Vijay Mallaya: This one’s not annoyed. He got away in time. And with banks mopping away cash from the system, the Kingfisher Villa appears to be safe for now. And yes, he remains the King of good times & bad. Cheers!!

Pics courtesy:

Hum Aapke Hain Kaun: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/entertainment/hindi/music/news/Salman-Khan-Madhuri-Dixit-starrer-Hum-Aapke-Hain-kaun/articleshow/30984692.cms

Khaat Sabha: http://timesofindia.indiatimes.com/india/As-Rahul-Gandhis-Khat-Yatra-ends-supporters-literally-take-their-seats-home/articleshow/54028666.cms

Mamata Bannerjee: http://www.topnews.in/people/mamata-banerjee?page=1

Human Pyramid: http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/world-news/human-pyramid-makes-britains-talent-6395057

Mayawati ststue: http://www.tradeindia.com/fp2078353/Kumari-Mayawati-Statue.html

Vijay Mallaya: http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-scotland-scotland-business-35681740

What they said, when India lost

Amir Khan: This is the result of a growing intolerance in the society. When we were filming Lagaan, Gracy was upset with the way the match was progressing & wanted to leave the sets. But I watched the whole match live on tv yesterday. We have to set things right. We should make Lagaan-2.

Arnab Goswamy: The nation wants to know, why the team lost in the semis. Today, in this most watched show, I, Arnab Goswamy, will ask our PM what he is doing in Brussels when India was playing this all important semi final on homeground. The nation wants to know, and I shall make Rahul Gandhi , what has he, as a self-proclaimed youth icon, done for this glorious game, which has given us such lovely memories. He has all the time to visit JNU & HCU, but no time to watch the cricket match? Today, both parties are in the dock & your channel will expose their hypocrisy. Now gentleman, if you will please let me speak. This is my show & you will speak only when i ask you to.

Arvind Kejriwal: This is the result of the corruption in cricket. Look at the muck I exposed in DDCA. The PM should resign after this loss. When I become the PM, I will eliminate corruption from BCCI too. Now, waiting for the release of Ki and Ka…

Assaduddin Owaisi: This team was bound to lose as it did not have representation from the minority community. Teams from England, Australia, Pakistan & Bangladesh had muslim players, but not the Indian team. This government is making cricket a non-exclusive game by keeping out minorities.

Kanhaiya Kumar: Hum le ke rahenge azaadi. Cricket se azaadi. Haar se azaadi. Jeet se azadi. Azaadi…

Mohan Bhagwat: We have to revive the traditional sports. Kabaddi should be made the Rashtiya Khel and included in the school syllabus. All sportspersons should say Bharat Mata ki Jai before a match to prove their nationalism. Sports federations should conduct Satyanarayan Katha before any world/asian championships.

Narendra Modi: Mitro, this loss is the result of the socialistic policies of congress in the last 60 years. Remember Lagaan, where India beat England in cricket? Today, Indian team had nothing to lose, so they lost the match. My government is launching "Har Mohalla, Gend Balla" programme to reclaim the glory of Lagaan. I am also renaming IPL as Bat for India.

Prakash Karat: Cricket is an imperialist game. No great country like Russia, China, Cuba, North Korea, plays cricket. Cricket is a conspiracy of the capitalist forces. Industrialists are promoting cricket to sell their products. Government should form a Joint Parliamentary Committee for nationalisation of cricket.

Rahul Gandhi: India has never won a world cup when there is a non-congress government. This is because of the sacrifice my family has made for the country. Secular forces should come together for revival of the game. Had the Indian team remembered Bernoulli's theorem, they could have got Simmons out early.

Ramdev: Going to the gym only develops the muscles. Team India should also practice Yoga for alround development. Patanjali shall launch herbal, organic food supplements that will make our team physically fitter & mentally stronger.

Uddhav Thackeray: This team cannot carry forward the legacy of Gavaskar, Vengsarkar, Tendulkar. We will not let Team India play in Mumbai if at least 4 Marathi Manoos are not in the playing XI. We also do not want any West Indies player in Mumbai Indians team. We will dig up the road outside Mukesh Ambani's house as a protest.

Picture Credits:

Amir Khan (http://khoobsurati.com/aamir-khans-first-look-pk-yay-nay.html)

Arnab Goswamy (http://topyaps.com/facts-about-arnab-goswami)

Arvind Kejriwal (http://www.ndtv.com/cheat-sheet/one-month-of-arvind-kejriwals-government-five-hits-and-five-misses-549064)

Asaduddin Owaisi (http://www.deccanchronicle.com/151005/nation-current-affairs/article/asaduddin-owaisi-ar-rahman-among-worlds-top-500-most)

Kanhaiya Kumar (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Kanhaiya_Kumar)

Mohan Bhagwat (http://www.dnaindia.com/india/report-rss-chief-mohan-bhagwat-calls-for-building-classless-society-2072744)

Narendra Modi (http://www.firstpost.com/politics/the-similarities-between-chandrababu-naidu-and-narendra-modi-664259.html)

Prakash Karat (http://www.thehindu.com/news/cities/bangalore/who-are-devas-shareholders-karat-asks-government/article1451717.ece)

Rahul Gandhi (http://archive.financialexpress.com/news/rahul-gandhi-compares-narendra-modi-to-mass-killer-adolf-hitler-at-rally/1232710)

Ramdev (http://www.newsmobile.in/articles/2015/06/21/bend-it-like-baba/)

Uddhav Thackeray (http://www.maharashtrapoliticalparties.in/uddhav-thackeray.html) 

The missing National Family finally pieced together!

We are becoming too sensitive. Last week, 8 persons attempted suicide in Rajkot to get the cow declared as Mother of the Nation. (Pls read http://indianexpress.com/article/india/india-news-india/rajkot-8-attempt-suicide-demanding-cow-be-declared-as-rashtra-maata/). A few months back, a Shiv Sena MP had demanded the same. (Pls read http://indianexpress.com/article/india/india-news-india/declare-cow-as-mother-of-the-nation-shiv-sena-mp/).

This was bound to happen. After declaring Gandhiji as the Father of the Nation, we stopped at that. Didn’t our founders know that Indians are clannish & other national icons should have been so honoured to avoid controversies? With a strong Prime Minister leading a government having a full majority, I request the Government of India to set up a committee and recommend names for the full set of national icons.

To get this going, here are my suggestions for our National Family:

Father: Let’s stick to the venerable MK Gandhi. That there is no other claimant for the position is evidence enough of his universal acceptance.

Mother: I don’t really back the cow for I want real humans. But I don’t want to have people dying on this account. Also, I will never annoy the Shiv Sena. So, Cow gets my vote for as the Rashtra Mata. Also, the cow has never been considered an animal, rather a part of the family, in our rich tradition. It has also taught us to be modest & humble. I remember, as a kid, we used to say "gai humari mata hai, humko kuchh nahi aata hai". It is still the same story.

Chacha: Nehru has occupied this position for a long time & Indians don’t rock the family boat. So, Nehru remains the Chacha.

Tau: I would go for Sardar Patel, simply because he was older than Nehru & Nehru is the Chacha. But at a time when the Jats are not in the best of moods, let us opt for the original Tau of indian politics – Devi Lal. Isn't a Jat being the Rashtra Tau a far greater honour than anything else? We can now hope that the Jats will forget about reservations for a few years. And that the railways will be able to peacefully move men and goods around.

Mausi: If Cow is the mother, shouldn’t Buffalo be the maternal aunt? After all, gai-bhais are always spoken as a pair. Buffaloes, though not revered as the cows, have been an equally integral part of agrarian life. And Mausis have always been an integral part of the family lore. Even Sholay, the first celebration of male bonding, had a Mausi playing a pivotal role in the movie.

Mama: Now this is the most difficult position. Who should be the role model, Shakuni or Kans? But we are selecting a national icon & Kans is definitely not a role model. My vote goes to Digvijay Singh, being the mentor of Rahul Gandhi in his (so far) failed political journey. For all the good intentions backing the wrong horse, shouldn’t this be the only criterion to emulate Shakuni mama? Diggy Raja wins hands down.

Bua: Umpteen no. of movies (the David Dhawan-Govinda ones are recalled immediately) have had a spinster Bua in a key role, who is wooed by the father/uncle of her nephew’s/neice’s love interest. Reminds you of Jayalalitha? Same here, and so it is her as our Rashtra Bua. Whether in prison, or out of it, she is the most sought after neta by the political backroom boys in Delhi.

Didi: This is a no-contest with Mamata Banerjee the only claimant. (If you do not find an image here, you can very well guess why!)

Bhaiya: Only a UPwala can fill this position for obvious reasons! We can consider the Biharis too, but the greatest of them (Laloo Prasad) will never be accepted by the proposed Rashtra Mata & Rashtra Mausi. Since beginning, every street level wannabe politician in UP has aspired to be the CM & every state level neta has considered himself to be a potential PM. A difficult choice, this one, as every UPwala thinks he is a political strategist. But I have the solution! As a national icon, who can match the Chhora Ganga Kinarewala? Even the most bhaiya of bhaiyas would agree.

Beta: Another no brainer. The one who has managed to stay a youth icon even deep into his middle age, the one who is (Congress’s) hope for the future, the one who is still feeling his steps in the world… Can there be any other National Kid?

Beti: Left out because our nation/society/tradition does not love, respect or care for our daughters.

Which completes our Rashtra Parivar, as far as I am concerned. But these are only suggestions from my side. For, I am a nobody & believe our netas are better suited for the job. I am sure, amidst all the walk-outs & sit-ins in the parliament, they will manage to find time for this job in national interest.

Picture credits:

Father (https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/f/f3/Mohandas_K._Gandhi,_portrait.jpg)

Mother (http://www.gettyimages.in/detail/video/woman-feeding-fodder-to-her-cow-faridabad-haryana-stock-video-footage/157296191)

Chacha (http://acurator.com/blog/Karsh_Nehru_Jawaharlal_01.jpg)

Tau (https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/d/d0/Chaudhary_Devi_Lal.jpg)

Mausi (http://www.hindustantimes.com/rf/image_size_640x362/HT/p1/2013/08/08/Incoming/Pictures/1105281_Wallpaper1.jpg)

Mama (http://static.indianexpress.com/m-images/M_Id_385152_Digvijay_.jpg)

Bua (http://s2.firstpost.in/wp-content/uploads/2014/03/jayalalithaa1AFP.gif)

Bhaiya (https://mrandmrs55.files.wordpress.com/2012/02/amitabh-bachchan-don-2.jpg)

Beta (http://media.indiatimes.in/media/content/2015/Nov/rahul-gandhi-in-bengaluru_5457bca4-9445-11e5-b13b-1ee01ddf34ff_1448604291.jpg)

The Other Modern Avatars that Modi Forgot

When our PM compared the Punjab CM (Prakash Singh Badal) to Nelson Mandela, other politicians lost no time ridiculing Narendra Modi. Of course, this is another of the bloopers that Modi routinely makes, but I feel our netas were peeved more with the fact that they have never been compared with any one as great as Mandela.

Now, I do not have the same stature as even the local politician but to assuage the feelings of our netas (and other bigwigs), here is my partial list (arranged in alphabetical order) of some of our countrymen who are no less illustrious than Mandela or the senior Badal:

Amit Shah – Forced to leave his home state (though under the orders of the court), he has braved it all out like that another famous exile – Dalai Lama. All but win the Nobel peace prize, but we all know the Nobels are usually a western conspiracy.

Asaduddin Owaisi – For the zeal & single-minded focus on voicing the concerns & protecting the interests of the significant minority, can there be a more suitable person to be considered Martin Luther King Jr of our times?

Asaram – His message of brotherhood to girls about to be raped (Pls read http://articles.economictimes.indiatimes.com/2013-01-07/news/36192700_1_asaram-bapu-religious-guru-gangrape) along with practical tips to avoid it, reminds us of that another spiritual leader who mesmerized the americans by addressing them as brothers (and sisters) – Swami Vivekanand (of course, SV was only attending a conference & had no reason to fear anything).

Laloo Prasad Yadav – (Hope the bhakts don’t gun me down for this one) Sardar Patel may get the credit for a mammoth of an achievement for uniting the various Indian states into one union. But I consider Laloo’s feat of uniting various political parties under a Grand Alliance as equally commendable & more difficult. Do we expect a Grander Alliance in 2019? If this one lasts till then, maybe we can.

Manmohan  Singh – “Read my lips”, famously said George Bush (Sr). Manmohan Singh, throughout his tenure, appeared he too was saying this. But either Madam did the talking or the kid was kicking up a storm & the ex-PM walked into the sunset as silently as he came in.

Rahul Gandhi – Isn’t it our Fundamental Duty under the constitution to develop a scientific temper? While other netas have not moved beyond Facebook & Twitter, only one to have displayed an understanding of fundamental science has been our RaGa. Recall how he applied the concept of “Escape Velocity” in the social domain (if you missed out this one, pls visit http://www.ibnlive.com/videos/politics/rahul-dalit-pitch-rahul-on-velocity-643775.html) & you will agree that he is Stephen Hawking of our political world.

Robert Vadra – Despite not being a Gandhian (well, he does have a Gandhi connection), he is the Vinoba Bhave of the 21^st century. And he did not even resort to any padyatra to make people give up their land, yet achieving a similar result.

Sheila Dixit – She revived the Commonwealth Games from ruins to one of the most successful sporting events hosted by India, just as Margaret Thatcher turned around the British economy. And she outlasted Thatcher by 4 years in office too (though never becoming a baroness).

Pictures sourced from:

Modi Tweet - https://www.sikh24.com/2015/10/12/capt-amrinder-singh-slams-modi-for-disrespecting-nelson-mandela-south-africa-files-defamation-case/

George Bush Sr. - http://www.stewwebb.com/2015/01/07/leonard-millman-and-george-hw-bush-narcotics-money-laundering/

Manmohan Singh - http://www.dnaindia.com/india/report-harsh-on-narendra-modi-manmohan-singh-leaves-rest-to-history-1944782

Martin Luther King Jr. - http://crenshawcomm.com/communications-lessons-from-martin-luther-king-jr/

Asaduddin Owaisi - http://muslimmirror.com/eng/muslims-are-the-only-community-who-are-indians-not-only-by-birth-but-also-by-choice-asaduddin-owaisi/

Sardar Patel - http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/patel-found-bar-on-dressbased-discrimination-needless/article6222528.ece

Laloo Prasad Yadav - http://www.mid-day.com/articles/supreme-court-grants-bail-to-lalu-prasad-yadav-in-fodder-scam/244427

Vinoba Bhave - http://www.samaylive.com/article-analysis-in-hindi/special-days-in-hindi/104122/vinoba-bhave-mahatma-gandhi-philosophy-ideas-bhoodan-movement-.html

Robert Vadra - http://metrovaartha.com/en/2015/07/23/bjp-submits-notice-for-privilege-motion-against-robert-vadra-for-facebook-post/

Stephen Hawking - http://www.belfasttelegraph.co.uk/news/world-news/stephen-hawking-very-ill-in-hospital-28476059.html

Rahul Gandhi - http://archive.indianexpress.com/news/for-success-dalits-need-to-break-free-from-jupiter-not-earth-rahul-gandhi/1180144/

Dalai Lama - http://www.telegraph.co.uk/news/worldnews/asia/tibet/8816545/Dalai-Lama-visa-blocked-over-South-African-trade-fears-with-China.html

Amit Shah - http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/tamil-nadu/amit-shah-for-law-to-ban-conversions/article6769669.ece

Margaret Thatcher - http://www.abc.net.au/news/2013-04-09/margaret-thatcher-in-her-own-words/4617186

Sheila Dixit - http://www.thehindu.com/news/national/sheila-dikshit-slams-insensitive-delhi-police/article4304217.ece

Swamy Vivekanand - http://www.niticentral.com/2014/09/11/swami-vivekanandas-911-america-237795.html

Asaram - http://indilens.com/63308-aiims-medical-board-examines-rape-accused-asaram-bapu/