Why stop at Salman, when Bollywood has so much to offer?

Appointment of Salman Khan as the goodwill ambassador of our Olympic squad has created fissures within the sporting community. I have already talked about that in my previous post (Where the Ambassador needs some Goodwill himself). But in the current times when even politicians limit themselves to 140 characters, it’s a good idea to have ambassadors for other areas too. And who better than Bollywood to provide us with these knights? Here’s my choice of Bollywood worthies to promote India & Indianness.

Amitabh Bachchan: How can a Bollywood list begin without the Big B? He may have been made the brand ambassador for Incredible India campaign, but I feel he can be an equally good ambassador for the banking industry. Remember Bofors case, where the Big B’s name cropped up along with brother Ajitabh? That proved that Big B wasn’t just loitering around after his shoots for Yashraj films in Switzerland. But Swiss banks becoming home to all & sundry was not to his comfort & he moved to upcoming destinations like Panama & British Virgin Islands, this time along with daughter-in-law. And it was not just “me & my family” for Amitabh. He also made ordinary Indians into millionaires through his TV show (KBC). Who knows he could be the messiah that Indian banks need after being kingfishered.

Sunny Deol: If love for his wife made him go all the way to Pakistan, imagine what would 125 crore Indians inspire him to achieve. I would like Sunny to be made the goodwill ambassador for the agriculture sector. He will then pull out all the hand pumps in Pakistan, Bangladesh & China which would give some respite to our suffering farmers. I am also sure that BCCI would be willing to shell out the expenses for a smooth conduct of IPL-10. And yes, people staying in Arnab Goswamy’s housing complex would be able to celebrate a wet dhuleti next year!!

Sanjay Dutt: There can be no better person than Sanjay Dutt as the ambassador for our Police force. He not only glamourized the gangster in his movies, but has also played many a memorable role as a cop. In real life too, he made a guarded police premises his second home and the policemen his extended family. Sanju baba is the one to champion the lives of policemen. Of course, I am also hoping that this will also keep him away from real life gangsters & real life guns. And that he will also not play Chatur Singh again!

Alok Nath: If the efforts of people such as Smriti Irani & Yogi Adityanath are successful, we are in for a socio-cultural revolution. But the left/commie/fiberal/sickular brigade is not playing ball. More damaging is the fact that the image of India & Indians is getting sullied abroad. So, who better than Alok Nath to showcase the values of Indian diaspora in the global arena. With the social media frenzy that our Sanskari Babuji generates, the decadent west may finally accept the traditional Indian way of life. But there is a downside to this… Next time our popstar PM performs at Madison Square, it would turn out to be bhajan sandhya. I am not sure whether Modi will like it.

Sunny Leone: It is not just our traditions & values, but also our culture & heritage that need a goodwill ambassador. Today, the world knows us mainly for Yoga & Taj Mahal. What about the other accomplishments of our ancestors in the field of arts, literature, architecture? To promote & popularize past glory, we need a globally known face & Sunny Leone has much more than that!! I don’t expect hordes of tourists waiting for a glimpse of the treasure inside Khajuraho caves just because Sunny is put on the job. But the world will definitely have more interest & better awareness of what our forefathers talked, wrote & created. Maybe, even the IIM’s would start a course in Sanskrit.

Do you have someone in mind who can be added to this list? If so, pls let us all know about him/her.

Picture credits:

Alok Nath (http://www.rediff.com/movies/report/alok-nath-reveals-his-favourite-sanskar-joke/20140103.htm)

Amitabh Bachchan (http://indianexpress.com/article/entertainment/screen/amitabh-bachchans-character-in-aankhen-2-will-be-neither-negative-or-positive/)

Sanjay Dutt (http://www.bollywoodlife.com/news-gossip/is-sanjay-dutt-getting-better-with-age/#!1/sanjay-dutt-policeuniform-220113/)

Sunny Deol (http://www.in.com/sholay/gallery-100-years-of-cinema-unforgettable-cinematic-moments-303498-50004622.html#21)

Sunny Leone (http://www.financialexpress.com/photos/business-gallery/183217/google-trends-india-2015-cricket-wc-beats-bahubali-to-top-sunny-leone-salman-khan-in-top-searches-too/5/)

Where the Ambassador needs some Goodwill himself

The Indian Olympic Association makes Salman Khan the goodwill ambassador of Indian contingent to Rio & its raining reactions. I love sports & adore all Indian sports persons. Not the administrators, though. I would have simply passed over this new IOA action as another of its pointless acts had it not been for Yogeshwar Dutt tweeting his disagreement, followed by Gautam Gambhir speaking against it. And I found my views mirroring those of the sports administrators this time! Here's why:

We have known Salman as an avid cyclist & his dad has also enlightened us of his swimming skills. But we seem to have forgotten his exploits in one of the oldest sports. I allude to the case where a black buck with suicidal tendencies came up against Salman & his bollywood colleagues. While animal lovers & judiciary may not have looked at it kindly, the incident showed Salman's love of sport. And his modesty too, for he did not leave behind any photos like those Maharajas & our Brit rulers in the good old days. 

Next, we come to the most famous (or infamous, if you prefer that) story about Salman - the hit and run case, as the media calls it. Here we have Salman (or his driver, but this is immaterial) driving his car (or SUV, but this is just a technicality) & he finds a person lying (or sleeping, but we are discussing Salman) on his path. Now, this guy could very well have slept in a park or a railway platform but what does he do? He is lying on a footpath, which is meant for pedestrians (the dalits of indian roads) to walk on. We often come upon such people who are sleeping, sitting or simply selling their wares on the footpath & we take the road on those occasions. But Salman doesn't play hockey for India, like those nice guys who mesmerise us with their skills all over the field but freeze in front of the goal. You may call Salman murderous, but I look at it as killer instinct.

And Salman is a proven winner, a champion in his trade. All his movies are super duper hits. And he does it without resorting to making irresponsible statements on politics or social issues. Which was the last Salman flop that you can recall (well, Prem Ratan Dhan Payo was an obligation)? Yes, Salman spells success.

So, here we have a sportsman with a killer instinct & a champion. Attributes you would use for someone like Virat Kohli. But Kohli's are a rarity in Indian sport. I am convinced that Salman matches the specs required for an ambassador of sports. While I respect Yogeshwar, Gauti & the venerable Milkha Singh, I don't agree with the charge that Salman is doing this to promote his film. Had he been commercial minded, he would have bought a team in a sporting league for himself (like Shahrukh, Abhishek or John Abraham). I feel we should not look for hidden agenda in Salman's actions. Remember, he is the guy who bares it all out in his movies. So let us put our differences aside & support Salman in his efforts to promote our Rio-bound athletes.

Bhai tum aage badho, hum tumhare sath hain!!