I didn't post this, Blogger did

Gurmehar Kaur is back in the news, though, as I write this she is going back into obscurity. Though it was an old pic of hers which provoked Viru Sehwag, whose return tweet was found humorous by many, including Randeep Hooda. Well, this post is not about the placard politics that’s being played out on social media. But what these newsmakers said, and the manner of their saying it, is I liked. Isn’t this blog also about the other whys? This intrigued me enough to go about asking people what they were doing, and why, & here’s the response I got:

I went to a busy, crowded government office & caught hold of a person who had just finished his transaction. And this common man (or aam admi or mango people, as you may prefer) innocently told me, “I am not corrupt, it is the system that is corrupt”. It was nearing lunch time &  I managed to have a quiet word with the official too, who informed me matter-of-factly, “I am not corrupt, it is the system that is corrupt”. Later in the afternoon, I bumped into a small time local neta. Hearing out my experience (narrated in an accusatory tone), he hit back like Yuvi going for a six, “I am not corrupt, it is the system that is corrupt”.

Different people, different roles, but one answer. I put a stop to my expedition, letting my imagination do all the hard work instead. If speech is free, why shouldn’t I hear what I wish to? So here it goes…

The first stop my thoughts made was at a private party where I managed to spot a bollywood superstar who was quite candid & admitted, “I am not a great actor, it’s our public that likes celluloid trash”. Big words, but I hope someday he gets courageous (and honest) enough to tell this to a producer too.

In Tamil Nadu where it’s only the supreme leaders of the two parties that win elections, I was surprised when this neta told me, “I can win elections on my own, but I need a leader to give me the ticket to contest”. Had it been UP or Bihar, he would have formed his own political party.

And this big businessman in a small town (are the rest like him too?), “I don’t fudge my accounts, I only manage my accountant & auditor” My advice to write a book on “Managing Accounts for Dummies” was declined as there would be no buyers.

Somehow managing to avoid a collision with this young kid with his girlfriend on the pillion, I found him zooming off with this reply, “I don’t drive on the wrong side, I only take the short cut”. Looking behind, I hoped the traffic cop didn’t take too short a cut after getting hold of this offender.

And finally this gem from a moderator of a newsroom panel discussion – “I am not shouting, the volume of the TV is set too high”. And I knew it was time to tune off & bring this post to a close.

If I ever get back to doing this exercise, I will be looking for: “I am not communal, religion is.” Who would that come from? Your guess is as good as mine!!