This post is not about the much publicized programme of the
very vocal & emboldened Sangh parivar outfits. This is just a year-beginning (too late for a year-ending one) list of those illustrious
candidates (in no particular order) who want to have, or those some want to see having, or those have
been successful in, their own Ghar Wapsi. So, here I go…
Narendra Modi – The sarcastic opposition parliamentarians
were clamouring for his Ghar Wapsi from a longish stint of diplomatic duty
& election campaigns. He did, yet they were unable to hear him speak what
they wanted to hear. Tough luck, said an even more sarcastic Jashodaben.
Anna Hazare – His was the most dramatic return to base.
After firing up an entire nation’s imagination, he went back to Ralegan Siddhi
once his lieutenant’s political ambitions outgrew the movement. When he
conquered Delhi’s maidan & the streets elsewhere, who would have imagined
that 2 years later he would not even make it to the inner pages of newspapers?
Dutee Chand – She was a champion athlete in making. But he
had to withdraw from competition owing to excess of androgens in her system.
Now he has been cleared & she is gearing up to be back on track, literally.
Hope she celebrates her Ghar Wapsi with plenty of medals for herself &
India, and muck for her detractors.
Arvind Kejriwal – Whether the Delhi electorate wishes it or
not, AK has decided for himself that Ghar Wapsi is the only option left open
after the drubbing at Varanasi. As a sympathizer & supporter one can only
wish, whatever be the outcome, we don’t end up discussing the rent he pays for
the Ghar. And of course, a healthy, cold-free, cough-free Wapsi.
Sanjay Dutt – The frequency with which he has been in &
out of Yerawada, it is not just his family but fellow inmates too who keep
looking forward to his Ghar Wapsi. One can’t fault Sanju baba though, it’s a
homecoming for him in either direction.
Team India – The losses that the men in blue have piled up
in overseas contests piling up, the fans have given up on them delivering “ache
din”. BCCI has to anchor Team India in India by having a longer IPL because
that’s the only time our stars shine.
Azam Khan’s Buffaloes – The entire UP Police turned out in
strength to ensure the Ghar Wapsi of these VIP Quadrupeds. Maneka Gandhi would
have been proud of our Men in Khaki, had they not been under the orders of a
rival political party. Last heard, the ASEAN countries have requested a
contingent of UP Police to be permanently stationed there for recovery of
missing aircrafts.
Congress – The party of the babalog won’t be able to emulate
the fairy tale of Azam Khan’s buffaloes. The party of freedom fighters is now a
party of the sons & daughters, nephews & nieces, sons-in law &
daughters-in-law of the sons & daughters, nephews & nieces, sons-in law
& daughters-in-law of the freedom fighters. And they have a long wait ahead
of them before their own Dada/Dadi/Nana/Nani ke Ghar (aka Parliament) Wapsi.
Mallika Sherawat – If she is still in Hollywood, what’s she
doing there? Now that even Ms. Leone (of all people) has started wearing
clothes in her movies, its time Ms. MS made a Ghar Wapsi & reclaim the turf
that was originally hers!
The Janta Party offshoots – With BJP occupying the right of
antics & centre of politics and the left front left behind in the polls,
the various left-of-centre, centre-of-left & left-out-of-centre netas who
migrated to politics of caste, religion, language, region & what not, have
planned a grand Ghar Wapsi & revive the grandeur of the original Janta
Party. Relevance may or may not matter in Indian politics, but will it be back
to the front for this born again Front?
MS Dhoni – He ended the year with a helicopter shot of an
announcement. The Man with a mane turned Captain Cool will now focus only on
ODI’s & T-20’s. Not technically a Ghar Wapsi, it is more of a Vidai from
the longer formats.
Now, this is a cue for
another year-end list – of the vidai’s we long for. But I will keep it for next
year! Return to check it out.
Wishing you lots of fun
in 2015!!!
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